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Geez, I remember having fantasies about women being hurt and humiliated as long as I've been alive. I don't remember a time when I didn't. I wonder if it's analogous to homosexuals that talk about always having known that they're gay. I don't really know why either. It's not like anything traumatic happened to me as a kid.

One clear early memory for me is I was playing with one of the neighborhood girls when I was very young. Maybe as young as five. And as we playing the girl tripped or something and started crying. Her mother came out and looked at her and looked at me and said in an accusing voice, "boys don't hit girls". The mother blamed me for it, even though it wasn't my fault. Maybe because of that, I've always associated women getting hurt as being the ultimate transgressive behavior.

Or maybe I'm just screwed up.